


Dude, Where's My' Human?

by lg6884



Category: Adventure Time
Genre: Gen, OCs - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-26
Updated: 2014-07-26
Packaged: 2018-02-10 13:03:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2026083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lg6884/pseuds/lg6884
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Jake leaves Finn in her' care, Marceline may have gotten more than she bargained for.<br/>Especially when Finn gets held captive by a horde of goblins full of meat-heads, who are armed with special anti-vampire gear, and are taking orders from someone who claims to be... THE DAUGHTER OF THE LICH KING!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Out Of The Limits of Darkness and Light

**Author's Note:**

> Due to a formatting error, the text seems to be... clustered together.  
> I'll have to get around to cleaning it up on a later date.

All is dark, nothing is visible a side from utter darkness as if it's brighter with your' eyes closed. "Wake up...Wake up...Wake up..." a voice said breaking the silence, bouncing off the surrounding walls of darkness. Finn groaned as he struggled to slowly open his' eyes only to find that he's been bound to a chair, his' legs, chest and, left arm confined to the chair and under locks to prevent him from breaking free. "Where...am I?" Finn said to himself as his' eyes adjusted to the single light, dangling from the ceiling and illuminating the human who's imprisoned in it. "Finally awake? Good." a female voice said, hidden in the darkness and sounding quite pleased. "Who's there?" Finn said defensively trying to estimate where the voice came from. "I could introduce myself, but I bet you'll amuse me more if you stay clueless like you are now." The voice said, likely with a smirk hidden in the dark. Finn struggled to try to break free to pursue his' captor but to no avail due to being shackled to the chair. "AAH...LET...ME...GO!" Finn shouted as he attempted to rock his' chair back and forth vigorously. "After I make you a more obedient pet." The voice said before laughing and fading back into the dark. "Who are you? And are you crazy, I'm no one's pet!" Finn said frantically rocking back and forth even more violently still trying to get his' chair to finally tip over. "I know but I want you socially presentable, so I'll have to train and discipline you like one." The voice said before again fading away. "I'm gonna mess you up SO HARD!" Finn said, still trying to get his' chair to fall over. Under a shamble of rubble "Man...what happened last night?" Marceline said as she rubbed her' throbbing forehead. "Finn, are you alright?" Marceline said as she looked around to find her' human friend, but to no avail. "Finn...Finn?" Marceline called out again and again as she again looked around. "Where could that weenie be?" Marceline said as she squinted her' eyes to try to look in the distance. Marceline looked around and suddenly noticed something, the pile of rubble she was under is part of Finn and Jake's tree house. "Man...what did we do last night?" Marceline said as she stopped for a moment to try to contemplate the events that lead up to her' current position. "Lets see..." Marceline said as the past events played back in front of her' eyes. "Jake came by yesterday to ask if I could watch Finn for a few days, and since I wasn't doing anything, I said I would... Finn somehow convinced me to tag along with him on a trip to Bonnie's, he reallydidn't wanna be alone with her for some reason. Blah, blah, blah... we fought a horde of goblins. Blah, blah, blah... wait I remember something about a knock at his' door, next...nothing..." Marceline said as she picked her self up from the rubbish. "Hey I found that vampire girl that bashed me over the head with a guitar! Let's mess her up already, we still need to report to her' little boyfriends new keeper." A voice over in the distance called out. 'Boyfriend' repeated once in Marceline's head and made her blush a slight shade of red from embarrassment at the thought of her and Finn being a couple, especially when he's with Flame Princess, but soon turned to anger once she realized that whoever that is knows where Finn is. Marceline turned and to her' surprise saw the leader of the goblins that she and Finn fought just the other night. "You may have beaten us the first time...and we may have lost the second time...but this time we're gonna kill you." said the goblin, who Marceline noticed had a crudely made protective mask on his' face. "Dang, I must have hit him harder than I thought" Marceline said to herself. "But apparently not hard enough to knock some sense into him..." Marceline mumbled with an annoyed sigh. "Get out those solar-surujin things we got for handing over the vampire's boyfriend!" The goblin said with a rage filled voice. 'Boyfriend' repeated again in Marceline's head and this time made her hover over the grass, filled with righteous furry and unknowingly fly into direct sunlight. "Aah!" Marceline called out in pain "What's the matter, too bright?" the head goblin sarcastically said. "I'm gonna enjoy this..." the goblin said as he wrapped his' fist up in the rope that seems as bright as the sun, which was irrelevant since the real sun was out. "Wait Hobb, the boss wants us to head back now..or else we'll get the disobedience button." another goblin, with an eye-patch, said. The leader goblin, named Hobb, looked at Marceline with a face so heated with intense hatred and anger that it could burn Flame Princess ran over to her' slowly sizzling body, picked her up and threw her with all his' strength into the shaded area she flew out of. As she slowly healed in the shade Hobb yelled, "I'm only letting you live for now so I can kill you with my' own two hands later!" as he disappeared from eyesight. "Yoy, what did me and Finn do last night?" Marceline said as she rubbed her, now scuffed, elbow. "Doesn't matter...I'll just go home, grab my' base, then I'll kick a little goblin butt and rescue Finn." Marceline said as she flew off into the shade from nearby trees.

* * *

** Author's Notes **

**For the record, the surujin or suruchin is one of the traditional weapons of Okinawan Kobudo. It comprises a 2–3 metre long rope with a weight tied to each end. Historically this weapon is very prevalent and have been found attached to a weapon or used separately.**

 


	2. Submerged in The Darkness' Light

After traveling through the shadows all day long, the sun finally disappeared behind the moon and, Marceline could actually try to navigate her' way home in the night sky. She looked around and noticed that the area she was in was far to familiar. "Ah glob..." The Vampire Queen said, as she face palmed herself, dreading her' current whereabouts. It was the Candy Kingdom, a place where she didn't want to visit because of an awkward encounter that took place earlier, when she had to use her' umbrella. "Of all the places in Ooo I could've been by...it had to be Bonnie's." Marceline said as she slowly descended into the Candy Kingdom. On her way down, because she knew she was going to hear a lecture, Marceline started regretting her visit Princess Bubblegum...until she heard a loud crash followed by an explosion coming from inside Princess Bubblegum's castle. After hearing the explosion, Marceline had to fly in to see if Princess Bubblegum was alright. When Marceline found where the explosion came from, thanks to her keen vampire senses, she couldn't help but be a little disappointed to see that the explosion was merely one of Princess Bubblegum's experiments that she's been working on literally blowing up in her' face. "Oh darn..." Princess Bubblegum said as she reached for a rag to clean soot off her face from her latest experiment. "How am I ever going to perfect this bonding agent when it's chemical reaction in living matter results in molecular distortion and spontaneous combustion?!" Princess Bubblegum said as she rested her face on her hands and her elbows on her knees. "Hey Bonnie, ya got a minute?" Marceline asked nonchalantly as she literally flew through the gaping hole in the wall. "Oh, hey Marceline. Sure but where's Finn, I thought you were suppose to watch him; which is weird since you'd only really be able to watch him whenever the sun's not out." Princess bubblegum said with a puzzled look on her, still dirty, face. "Yeah...weird. Look I'm looking for Finn have you..." "YOU LOST FINN?!" Princess Bubblegum interrupted. "UGH Look I woke up under a pile of rubble... got mistaken for Finn's girlfriend... nearly got the jelly beaten out of my doughnut by a goblin with anger issues... and had to fly around in an evil dark forest all day!" Marceline said in a no-nonsense way that caused the princess to take a step back. "Alright, alright." Princess Bubblegum said as she tried to calm the furious vampire queen. "Look Bonnie, I'm just...I can't remember anything from yesterday cept' me and Finn fighting a goblin horde and you needing us for something." Marceline said as she tried to calm down. "I needed Finns' help." The princess corrected in a monotone. "Whatever, did Finn or me tell you where we were heading after we left?" Marceline said impatiently. "I believe you said you and Finn were on your way to a party in the Cloud Kingdom." The Princess said as she returned to her' beakers. "Great..." Marceline said sarcastically. "Now I've gotta go all the way to the Cloud Kingdom..." Marceline said, preparing to take off until her' curiosity got the better of her. "By the way, what the plum is that stuff? It looks nasty." Marceline said, unable to leave without an answer. "Oh, it's just a behavior modification serum." The princess said, not taking her' eyes off of her experiment. "Why?" Marceline said with a disturbed look on her' face. "Oh it's just a precaution in case I ever need to do something that would require it for the good of my' kingdom." Princess Bubblegum said unhappily as she ventured back to her' experiment. "Hey, I just thought of something." The Princess of the Candy Kingdom said with both a voice and facial expression full of excitement. "Okay, what do you want?" Marceline said with a voice that sounded like it was forcibly dragged out. "One of my' previous experiments was a special chamber that assists its user in remembering memories that were lost due to any physical or mental trauma." The Monarchy of Candy Kingdom said with a smile. "I'll gladly let you use it if you let me try bonding my' serum with a piece of your' uh...not-alive DNA so it can bond with a living things DNA and structural matter." Princess Bubblegum finished, with a nervous smile. "Uh...fine. But you can only take one hair." Marceline said with a face as if she was admitting defeat. After 5 minutes of experimentation, Princess Bubblegum had her' now perfected serum and was now escorting Marceline to a glass chamber underneath an open sun-roof. Marceline looked with disgust at the sun-roof and then at the princess-who reads to orphans-with even more disgust and tension that a penny could bounce off. "WHAT THE MATH?!" Marceline said with a booming voice with such power that the very ground shook and a serpent like face like raven-black colored horns. "It's not what you think...it's lunar powered-I swear to Glob." The Princess tried to say with a reassuring voice. "If you've had so much trouble lately than how do I know you're not wrong?" Marceline, defensively, asked. "Because you're just gonna have to trust me for once!" The princess, finally, managed to burst out. "If you really care about Finn then please trust me" "Okay..." The Vampire Queen said after a seemingly long awkward silence. The Princess began Pressing a series of buttons and pulling levers that caused a series of lights to flash. After a final, blindingly bright, white light flashed before her' eyes...the entire night began flashing before Marceline's eyes. Back in The Darkness Finn is continuing his' struggle to free himself from his shackles while being taunted by the laughter from his' captors' voice. "I've only tolerated your' insolence because from what I've studied from your history tells me you don't have the pepper to continue this pointless struggle of yours." The voice said before returning to her taunting laughter. "Nobody insults my' pepper!" Finn said, now full of righteous furry, as he struggled to the point that his face turned as red as his' family sword. Finn continued to struggle, even with the voice taunting him, and just when he felt the need to stop; his' left leg-from the calf down-was free from its shackle. "Well...it would seem that I may have miscalculated." The voice said, in an almost unnoticeable disappointed tone. "No matter. Hobb, your' assistance is requested." The voice said before the sound of a door opening and closing was heard. "Just make sure you don't leave any marks, you may however break an arm or a leg." The voice said in a voice completely devoid of compassion and care. "Good, but I can't promise that I'll stop with just one..." Hobb the goblin, who suddenly appeared behind Finn in the light, said with an unsettling voice and a grin before letting out a laugh that may only be rivaled by that of The Lich. "Wait, how did I even get here?" The dimwitted goblin said in a mood killing state of confusion. "Hobb, you totally ruined my' mysterious vibe...No more questions or you'll get the disobedience button!" The voice said in an unapproving tone. Hobb let out a silly cowardly squeal and made no other noise other than the sound of him cracking his' knuckles, along with a low wimpy whimper. Hobb was showing great determination to fulfill his' promise as he'd repeatedly angle his closed fist so that his knuckles would be like adjacent rocks as he made harsh-ear splitting-contact with Finns' chest and an occasional one to the top of his' head. A wicked smile was on the face of that cruel goblin, until he punched one time too many and unintentionally caused Finn to be broken free from his' chair. "Okay, s'about time I manhandled your guyses' bananels!" Finn said, battle damaged, with a smirk. "Ah Gob..." Hobb said before Finn tackled him to the ground and into the dark. Soon after Finn had to open his eyes and see that he's been confined to a stretcher and noticed something cold lied on his' chest. Before Finn could even question what kind of position he was in, he felt a pair of cold rubber gloves covering warm hand latching onto his' face and heard the voice talking aloud to someone Finn knew. "How is he Doctor Princess?" The voice said in a rather worried, concerned, tone. "He's got a few bumps, bruises, and'll probably have to stay bedridden for some time; but don't worry he'll be fine." Doctor Princess said as she finished examining the human. Doctor Princess who is that you're talking to? Whoever it is kidnapped me and...hey, can't you hear me? why...I can't even hear me...what's going on, why can't I talk? "It's a good thing you brought him here, otherwise we may not have been able to properly set his' casts." Doctor Princess said in a voice that told just how serious Finns' breaks were. "And another thing, you were wrong about the damage to his' throat and because we tried to treat him for high-pitch voice syndrome, he wont be able to speak for at least three days." The Doctor said, her words sounding like she was saying them at a very slow pace. "Oh really? Darn three days..." The voice said in a deceptive tone that Finn knew was secretly filled with relief. "Yeah, so another thing; we'd like to keep him here for observation, just until he can talk again, unless you'd rather..." "Oh, that wont be necessary. I'll take care of him..." The voice said reassuringly. "FLARG" Finn thought. "Oh and-just a bit of advice-you may also want to stay for a check-up, your' voice sounds...well different." Doctor Princess said "I appreciate the concern but I'm merely a little hoarse today, nothing to be worried about and I promise to stop by if Finn or I have any problems." The voice said before starting to wheel Finn out of the hospital. "Oh and Doctor, I'd also appreciate it if this little visit we've had today was confidential." The voice said, just before she and Finn left through a backdoor. Finn struggled to stay awake to try and map-out where she was taking him, but was unable to do so once they were near the ocean because Finn closed his' eyes shut and refused to open them until he couldn't hear the roaring waves...unfortunately he never heard the waves stop; so he drifted off into a state of slumber that could transition into a waking nightmare. Once the boy awoke, he was strapped in yet another chair but this one was positioned in a dark dinning room with a long table that could sit 100 on its left and right side lying in front of him and the only light source being two candles positioned out of Finns' reach but. they lay close enough to where they illuminate the food that lies in front of him. 'What?' Finn tried to say as he slowly regained his' train of thought. "Good, you're awake. Now eat, or I'll simply have someone force feed it to you." The voice, who Finn could finally see due to her being silhouetted by candles on the opposite side of the table, ordered. "I allowed for your' right arm to be movable rather than lie dormant so you could at least feed yourself." The figure said in a disappointed tone. Finn looked at what lied in front of him, but couldn't deny that his' stomach was quite famished, and begrudgingly reached for a utensil that was placed on his' lap to eat. Once Finn picked up the utensil, a spork, he simply ate the food that was placed on his' plate; it looked like gray mashed-potatoes and was absolutely tasteless. "That's no-meal, a special kind of food that gives the body all its required nutrients; make no mistake I won't simply kill you but I see no need to reward you for your' disobedience with anything other than life-sustaining food." The figure said. "Coo uh ooo?" Finn managed to say, even though it nearly caused him to suffocate. "You and I both know eachother, yet only now have I truly lived and I am no longer who I once was; rather I've evolved into something else, the future ruler of Ooo. But for now...you may call me Princess Belinda, or as I am rightfully so Lich Princess!" The voice said, shrouding herself in even more mystery.

** Author's Notes **

**Belinda means beautiful snake, she's technically the daughter of the Lich King...**


	3. Shedding Light on the Darkness (I)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is mainly flashbacks telling you what happened and how Finn was/got kidnapped.
> 
> What Marceline herself is remembering thanks to Princess Bubblegum's machine will be separated from the regular text by lines.

It's a quiet day in the land of Ooo the two-headed duck is playing around in Finn and Jake's pond, the sun is perfectly centered behind the tree fort and you can hear birds chirping. Suddenly the door to the tree fort is flung open, nearly falling off its' hinges, and all the birds fearfully fly away at the loud noise. A certain, familiar, yellow dog slowly walks out dragging an unusually large blue backpack and takes a moment to breathe in the fresh air and enjoy the sun slowly rising, even higher, in the sky. The dog pops open his' backpack and pulls out a teal colored camera-phone. He happily looks at his' contacts list, searching through it for his' best friends numbers, for someone to watch after his' little brother. The first name on the list was the, Pink-skinned, Princess Bubblegum; Jake had his finger on the call button but didn't press the button, believing it would be too awkward (and worried Flame princess would get the wrong idea and bake their' beans), the next number was his' G-F Lady Rainicorn who he skipped over (since he's heading over there after he finds someone to watch Finn), next he tried a certain vampires' number. When he tried Marceline's number she didn't pick-up so, since he knew he couldn't be late and that Marceline's house isn't that far away from Lady's, he decided to get going and merely call Princess Bubblegum if Marceline said "no" (knowing that Bubblegum would be more than happy to watch/take care of Finn for a few days...) On his' way to the vampire queen's cave Jake, started to develop a funny feeling that someone was watching him, but when he'd stop and check the feeling would just disappear. Jake also started to worry about what kind of trouble Finn could get himself into without anyone watching him. Once Jake was outside Marceline's house he could hear his' vampire friend jamming-out on her' base guitar and started to knock on her' front door.

* * *

 

Marceline, who was sporting a long-sleeved bright red shirt with her' usual dark blue pants and red boots, was rocking out on her' axe base when she suddenly heard a knock on her' front door. When she opened her' door she was happy to see her friend, Jake The Dog, and a little surprised to see him alone. "Hey Jake, what's up?" Marceline said as she placed her' ax-base against the side of her' wall. "Hey, hey Marceline. You got a second?" Jake said as he took off his' backpack and left it by the door frame. "Sure, what's with the backpack; you going somewhere?" Marceline said as she closed the door. "Oh nothing, I'm just gonna be away for a few days and I don't wanna worry about Finn getting into too much trouble, so I was wondering..." "If I could babysit?" Marceline interrupted. "Uh...yeah, so you think you can do it?" Jake said with an embarrassed smile. "Alright, I'll do it. It's not like I've got anything else to do right now." Marceline said with a shrug. "Thanks, I've gotta get going." Jake said as he picked-up his' blue backpack on his way out the door. Marceline flew over to her' window and watched Jake rush out of her cave and then started to gaze at the sunlight that made the early morning sky seem to set a blaze. Marceline casually flew upstairs and grabbed her' sun hat and umbrella and was ready to leave when she realized she needed to fill, her' zombie dog, Schwabl's food bowl. "Schwabl, chow time!" Marceline called out as she filled the bowl with food from the top of her' cupboard. Marceline laughed as she was heading out of her' house thinking 'how boring Finn-watching could be.' When Marceline got to her' old house, now the home of Finn and Jake, Ooo was still awakening from its slumber and Marceline began to regret not bringing along her' axe base to strum because it's now too late for her to go back for it. "Hey Finn, you up yet?" Marceline called out before simply flying through the window. "Finn?" Marceline again called out as she continued to look for the hero. Marceline searched from down in the kitchen to Finn & Jake's bedroom. Marceline then headed to the bathroom, to take care of her' business when she started to hear something...rushing water! Marceline tried to get out of the bathroom as soon as she could, to avoid scarring Finn and herself for life, but when she opened the door she saw Finn preparing to sit-down in the bathtub, struggling to get his' hat off, and her' face became as red as strawberries and she became utterly frozen. Her immobility lasted only 3 seconds, but for her it seemed like 3 hours, before she could unsteadily float back to her' hiding place, wishing to Glob she hadn't of just seen the little boy who's like a brother to her in the way she just did. "Yeah, I'm not going back out there..." Marceline said aloud with her' pupils, as big as tennis balls, dilated from the psyche-scarring transaction. Marceline stayed in there for a few minutes, until she heard footsteps leaving the room, before she finally emerged. Marceline slowly, and cautiously, reentered Finn & Jake's room and found Finn, fully clothed thankfully, sitting on his' bed putting on his green adventure pack. "Oh, hey Marceline. What're you doin here?" Finn said as he finished tying his' shoes.

* * *

Everything went dark so Princess Bubblegum powered her' machine down as Marceline walked out of the glass chamber. Princess Bubblegum walked over to her' friend; blushing a little due to the sight of Finn that she, thanks to her' machine that holographically projects memories, just witnessed. "Marceline, are you okay?" the princess, with a worried tone, asked. "Yeah...I just need to take a break, I'm starving." Marceline said as her' stomach began to growl for anything red. "Sorry, that's a side-effect to the holographic-amplifier of-memories." the princess said as she helped Marceline over to the doorway leading to the spiral-staircase back up to the castle "Would it kill you to just call it H.A.M., cuz' that name will make people die from boredom." the vampire said with a sly smirk. "Oh, ha ha h..." Bubblegum tried to say before she was interrupted by a wailing scream. "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" Marceline called out in pain as she began to clutch her' knees to her chest and crumble to the floor.

** Author's Notes **

**I'd say any eye for an eye right? now Marceline and Pb have seen Finn in a way they never thought they'd see.**

**Author's Note:**

> This is a story I posted on my' FanFiction.Net account, under the same name. It is ongoing and will be posted on both sites. This one will be brought up to date, but the writing for this story in general is on hiatus.


End file.
